I like the self-help books as a genre, as well as some like to romantic literature or horror movies. I like your promise fundamental fix everything that goes wrong in your life. Follow this simple system of 7 habits, 25 steps, 99 tips and be happy forever. But all I have to change in my life overwhelms me.
For this reason I sometimes wonder if someone manages to really get them out.
However with the book “The Achievement Habit” of Bernard Roth I have learned not one but three tricks that really work. It will be because the author is a mechanical engineer and Professor of design at Stanford University. I want to say that it is not a “dreamer”, things that are supposed to they have to operate. He was one of them that they began to apply the principles of what is known as “design thinking” to the teaching of mechanical engineering. The book tries to do the same, but with the personal development.
The tricks I learned are very easy and all you require is to change a couple of words on the things we say to ourselves. Or is, modifying the way in which we formulate a problem:
- Instead of saying”I have to…”, say”I want to…”. When we say that we have to do something, we cause internal resistance. It is as if someone forced us to do so, which is rarely true. If we say that we have to do it, it is usually because we have chosen to do so. Say that we want to do it makes that task despite us less, we feel more owners of our lives. It can be that the task remains unpleasant, but at least is clear who is in charge here.
- “Change the”but”by the”y” o “In addition”. The word ‘but’ may seem very innocent, but has a very destructive effect, since it is able to transform any phrase in a negative. The “but” closes the conversation: “I’d like to travel, but flying in airplane scares me.” There is nothing else to do. If we instead say “I’d like to travel and fly by plane’m me afraid”, our brain recognizes a problem with two conditions and Gets to a solution. It may be a cruise, a trip by bike or even on foot. Or a course to overcome the fear of flying.
- Stop saying”It frightens me…”and start saying”I’d like to…”. When we talk about everything that gives us fear to do, believe in the negative consequences You can have our attempts: “afraid of telling my boss that wants a pay raise because it will think that I only want the money”. When we talk about what we would like to do, we focus on the positive consequences the same acts, which could give us the motivation to do so: “I would like to ask for a pay rise because it could thus make that trip to Bhutan”.
I have tried to use these tricks and they work. Last week I changed the “I need to pick up the House and work a couple of hours” that sounded in my head by the “I want to pick up the House and work a couple of hours” in my calendar. It worked. Then I tried something harder: “I want to unload the dishwasher”. ¡It worked!
You also try and then tell us about it.
uspsf February 6, 2018
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